Adventures in Babysitting with Sabrina Carpenter, as good as the original?

It was to be doggy date night. Myself, Piper, Asia, Quincy, and Hazel. Quincy puts himself to bed every night around 8pm so first up, we (me, Piper, Asia, Hazel) watched the original Adventures in Babysitting starring Elisabeth Shue. Naturally, last night we followed it up with the 2016 remake starring Sabrina Carpenter. Why do people think remakes are ever a good idea? Some movies just need to be left alone. Shawshank Redemption. Forrest Gump. The Notebook. I wouldn’t have put Adventures in Babysitting in that category until today. Disney, hands off of the 80s movie. Step back and slowly move away.

I’ll just get right to it. The movie was bland, predictable, and there was nothing endearing about any of the characters except for little derby girl AJ Anderson. You know how people hurt themselves just to make sure they’re still alive? I almost punched myself halfway through the movie. One, to make sure I still have feelings and two, to punish myself for willingly watching it. The modern retelling of the story showcases two babysitters. How original. I knew pretty early into the movie that I already couldn’t care less about what happened to either babysitter. But I tried. I really did try. It’s kind of sad when the best movie moments were just a copy & paste from the original, as specific as having their own “Babysitting Blues” moment… except it was a rap. Even lines like “Next time ask for $10 more per hour” was a quick edit of the original where the line was to ask for an extra $1 an hour. The final cheap copy was in the final few moments of the movie. In the original, each person says it was the best night of their life, culminating in a tender moment where Chris Parker (E. Shue) pauses and says, “Mine, too.” In that line, she affirmed everything the kids were feeling, brought them up to her level of coolness, and the group was forever bonded in that moment and we, as the audience, felt it. The updated version was so disjointed and when it was S. Carpenter’s turn to proclaim it has her best night ever as the babysitter, the moment hadn’t built up so her delivery was just another line in a forgettable scene that could’ve been, should’ve been, the perfect touch to end the movie. Instead, I should’ve punched myself because I felt nothing. Dead inside.

In closing, there was no “Babysitting Blues” hilarity in the update. Just a rap battle where the two babysitters roasted each other and did nothing to have us like any of them any more than we already did… or didn’t. The rhyming of the rap was fine, I’ll give them that. But the blues in the first movie was simply great for the improvisational feel, the music and musicians, the humor, and no one on stage taking themselves too seriously.

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Skip this one if you can. Go to the original (also on Disney+) for a better cinema experience, even if Disney edited it to be less offensive. 🥴

-Out of the Wilderness