Honestly, I’ve been sitting on that post for a while. It’s the most transparent I’ve been, well, the most personal. I love writing in a way that makes you laugh, that makes me laugh, but that one, obviously, is different. I sincerely hope you look at me with compassion, without much judgement, and continue hanging on as I make my way through this wilderness.
I know if any girl I was dating or about to date read my last post, they wouldn’t touch me with a ten-foot pole. But the post wasn’t about saving my dating life. To be honest, there’s not much to save anyway. I wanted to come clean, whether it’s to 3 readers or 3,000. Because there’s only one me and I’m trying to make that one me look like the me I want him to be. He looks a lot like my grandfathers. He acts like them, and acts like my dad…chivalrous, caring, maybe rough around the edges but has respect for people, and for women. That’s part of what being a Wilder is. Another part is extreme athleticism (OK I’ll stop trying to be funny). But strip away my last name, and you know what, it’s really part of what being a man is. Like Hozier sings, “we were born sick” and according to the Bible, it’s true. I was born selfish, dirty, and in need of some discipline.
These last couple of posts are about the journey since that birth day.
-Out of the Wilderness