10 Signs She’s Not Into You… #4

#4 She leaves hints hoping you’ll pick them up.

And these aren’t the good kinds of hints, fellas. Like when you ask if they have plans for the weekend, and they do. Like, down to the minute. You can be sure that if she had any interest in dating you, she wouldn’t have just rattled off how busy sherlock holmesshe is for the next few days… or weeks… or years. Other hints: you mention your passion for bowling. She mentions her hatred. She talks about her latest love interests… who aren’t you. She uses the word ‘boyfriend’ with the words ‘I’ and ‘have’ and ‘a’ in front of it. OK, that one’s not so subtle.

In a nutshell: Put on your Sherlock Holmes cap and investigate. Her hints are the window to her feelings. So before you rush into a house and trip all kinds of alarms, wipe your feet on the doormat. Take a breath. And peer in the window. Metaphorically, of course. A restraining order will do you no good.

10 Signs She’s Not Into You… #5

If you haven’t been to Nashville before, consider this your invitation. Live music pretty much anytime of the day- from rock to country to bluegrass to classical, the city has it all. There’s a zoo, not to mention a couple of professional sports teams (go Preds)! And downtown Nashville was also the site of this year’s annual company Christmas party. christmas partyI brought a buddy along with me and we sure had a good time. He met a lot of my work friends and a lot of my work friends’ friends. There was one friend of a friend in particular that latched on to him pretty early in the night. She was a cute brunette, dressed well, with a smile that seemed quite genuine. However, let me set the record straight: though I’m being very complimentary, I was not taking interest in her. But if you’re ever in a situation like this and you are interested, you’ll be heartbroken when…

#6 The next day she asks about your friend.

That’s exactly what happened to me. I got a text from my friend asking if the guy I brought was single. So let’s act as if I was interested in the girl. This text would have been devastating to receive, right? I would’ve had to consult The Bro Code for advice on how to handle it, but I’m 99% sure it’s always “bros before hoes.” Translated that means, the friendship you have with your guy friend is more important than making out. Although in my case, it often meant: girls you like are going to like your brother more than you. Ouch! But his face is more symmetric than mine, so I get it.

Getting back to the main point, and it’s pretty obvious: if the girl you like is showing more interest in someone else, move on. This sign is in the same arena as “Trusting Your Intuition” because often times you’ll get a vibe if she’s digging someone else.

But anyway, like I said earlier, go Preds!
-Out of the Wilderness

10 Signs She’s Not Into You… #6

I learned this sign the hard way. It was back when I was on Match.com. I was emailing back and forth with a potential and we decided to go on a date. Great! Our first date had all the elements of being successful. A beautiful night in Nashville and tickets to a Ben Rector show. But guys, take note of this…

#6 when you hang out, she appears to be unhappy.

I have a fault and it’s this: I immediately decide whether a relationship’s going to work in the first few minutes. So the moment she parked in my driveway and we met, I heard a game show buzzer and saw a big red X hovering over her head. Not good. But hey, maybe this was the beginning of a good friendship. Plus, we’re going to a good show in Nashville. And if it wasn’t for her sour attitude… the. whole. night. it would have been a great show! I guess I had a big red X over my head, too. But that’s not a good excuse for asking to leave early. Sorry, Ben Rector. We never spoke again and I think it’s safe to say I’ll never see her in a white dress.

My Beef With Christmas Music as Heard on Christian Radio

Since I was a little guy, I’ve loved Christmas music. From “Joy to the World” to “Christmas Canon” to “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer,” all of it reminds of why I love this time of year. Well, not because someone’s grandma got run over by a reindeer, mine certainly didn’t, but you know what I mean… being with family, creating memories, and of course, the history-altering birth of Jesus.

manger1What really gets my goat this season is the Christmas music I’m hearing on Christian radio. Here’s what happens… I’m driving down the road flipping through the stations. I hear “Joy to the World” which is my all-time favorite Christmas song. So of course I’m going to turn it up and sing along. Verse 1… awesome. Verse 2… awesome. Then as soon as I gracefully begin singing verse 3, I’m cut off by… what’s this? Different lyrics? And the melody doesn’t even sound the same! Now instead of singing about joy to the world, I’m asking “What in the world?”

I understand since American Idol came around, it’s popular to “make it your own.” I get that and for the most part, I like the idea. I still remember hearing Phillip Phillips’ version of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller.” It was amazing. Or David Cook’s heartfelt rendition of Lionel Richie’s “Hello.” Plus, who can forget Adam Lambert singing “Ring of Fire”? I loved all of those. But when it comes to this issue I have with some Christmas songs, well, it’s a genre of music you don’t really need to change. It’s what the American Idol judges would say about a Whitney Houston song. Just sing it well. That’s all.

scene from A Christmas Story
scene from A Christmas Story

It’s like these artists took your favorite Christmas sweater, sewed in their initials, and now they’re selling it on Etsy. Or if I were to repackage everyone’s favorite movie “A Christmas Story” with an added scene I shot myself because, well, I wanted to call it my own. Then I sell it on eBay as the “extended version.” The most recent example I’ve heard this season is a song called “Joy to the World (Unspeakable Joy).” Let’s not even get into the confusing conflict of a song with lyrics about something that’s unspeakable. That’s not the point. The point is they damaged a perfectly good sweater.

A wise man once said that if a person comes to him with a problem, they should also come with a solution. So I’ll take his advice. The solution to this problem is simple. Sing the songs as they were meant to be sung. Or come up with something original. I know it’s tough to come up with a timeless Christmas song… nearly impossible. But artists should try. Mariah Carey did it with “All I Want For Christmas.” Another instant classic was written by a comedian, “Mary, Did You Know?”

There’s more that can be said about this whole “repackaging” thought, especially in Christian music. But instead of repackaging that conversation, this site hits the bull’s-eye.

Merry Christmas!
-Out of the Wilderness

10 Signs She’s Not Into You… #7

A lot can be said about a woman’s intuition. Well guess what laaaaadies? We have intuition, too! Bam. Got her. Seriously, we do. It takes longer to develop, sure. To the junior high guy, intuition is just a word from last year’s spelling bee. College, we begin to understand dating advice from our fathers because it matches up with our budding intuition. Our development is a bit slower, but it’s there. So guys, when you happen upon a coed that strikes your fancy, listen when…

#7 Your gut tells you to move on.

raftIt comes down to trust. Especially if you’ve already started pursuing her. If your gut is telling you she’s not interested, trust it. You’re probably not wrong. Granted, the river banks directing the path of your intuition are formed by how she responds to you and your advances, it’s still up to you to float. Keep your head above water by knowing where the boundaries are, and act accordingly. Plus, if you go against your intuition, you run the risk of capsizing your boat. And your boat in this scenario is any chance you have of dating her friends.