You take naps in a hammock. In your neighbor’s yard.
When you hold a piece of paper, you can’t tell where your hand ends and the paper begins. Yes, you’re that pale.
It’s still colder outside your house than inside your refrigerator.
You refer to June as “…the month I’m hittin’ PC Beach! Holllllaaa!”
North Korea’s gonna blow the world up anyway, might as well get some sun first.
Your tramp stamp hasn’t seen the light of day since Labor Day 2011.
The state of Florida said a good place to “stand your ground” is at the beach. Holllllaaa!
You just watched Titanic 3D and thought the door Rose floated on looked like a righteous surfboard.
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10 More Signs You’re Ready for a Beach Vacation