There’s a well-known TV personality that sounds a lot like President Obama. Certainly I’m not the first one to catch this but hey, here’s a challenge for you: click on the link below then close your eyes. Can you guess if it’s the real Barack Obama or TV host Montel Williams? I suppose Saturday Night Live needs to scoop Montel up for an ongoing Obama impersonator, right?
It’s a Fight!!!! (Daytona 500 Part 5)
So where did we leave off? Oh yeah, right before the fight…
Harsh words.
Chicken sandwiches.
Beer bellies.
We were in line to get lunch when this guy who was slightly intoxicated cut to the front of the line. Players in this story are: Suit Guy (not sure why he was wearing a suit but OK), Kid (about 15 yrs old or so), Gator Belly (the drunk guy, who was wearing a Florida Gators shirt), and me. My sister Shannon was safely off to the side under a decent shelter. Order after order had the staff in the trailer/kitchen backed up so it was more tense that it needed to be. Of course, getting rained on didn’t help either.
Suit Guy was the first to confront Gator Belly. He was quite articulate in his stance against this guy cutting, and I was in full support. But Gator Belly wouldn’t back down and leave. He just stood there like he was making some sort of civil rights statement. But he was white, he was wrong, and he was rather annoying.
Suit Guy said his piece and all remained quiet on the western front. As Kid and I moved up to order, Gator Belly again tried to jump in front of us. The kitchen staff handled it poorly. They should’ve made the guy leave with threats of calling authorities but they just smiled and tried to wish it all away. Gator Belly wasn’t leaving. They say to pick your battles, and I guess this is one Gator Belly chose in the moment. Well, guess what? So did I. Picking up where Suit Guy left off, I confronted the line-breaker by telling him he needed to leave. I kept thinking of all the folks in line behind me who’ve been waiting for half an hour, and the Kid who was sort of shuffled off to the side, perhaps not even getting a chance to get his order in. My anger rose. I wasn’t going to let this guy win. Not today. Words were exchanged and all I can specifically remember is saying, “You have an ugly shirt and an ugly attitude!” Nice one.
I’m not proud. I wish I’d thought of something more clever but the truth is he did have an ugly shirt (remember, it was a Florida Gator shirt), and his attitude was poor. Then at one point I put a hand on his shoulder and told him he’s not going to order before us. That’s when he bowed up and said something to the affect of “Touch me one more time!” I didn’t touch him one more time.
I won’t even get into the fact that while this was happening, the guy behind me ordered his food and left. That was a cold thing to do, sir. But the story ends better than it started. My sister got her chicken sandwich and so did the young Kid. Plus, I managed to get my cheeseburger without a side order of a black eye.
And if you can believe it, there’s more to tell from our first NASCAR race ever! Check out part 6!
-Out of the Wilderness
Wave the Green Flag! (Daytona 500 Part 4)
Aloe Blacc.
Jeff Gordon.
Country music.
Where I come from, rain is a good thing! -Luke Bryan
My sister and I made it to back to the gate entrance a couple hours before the rain started. Of course, we didn’t know it was going to rain at all, so we walked in excited for our first NASCAR race ever.
We scoped out a few lunch options then found our seats in the Turn 2 section and I must say the view was fantastic. All turns except for part of turn 3 were visible so that was a good surprise. We chatted with the people around us who were also from out of town. On the large jumbotron we watched Luke Bryan gyrate around the stage, much to the delight of fans cheering wildly for him to look their way.
After a short set from the country heartthrob it was time for driver introductions. Shannon went crazy for Jeff Gordon.
A few minutes later, the national anthem was performed by Aloe Blacc. He did a relatively conservative rendition which was smart given the audience: NASCAR fans that might love the USA more than their own mullets (it’s a close race, though). The flyover was really cool. I caught the second pass of the fighter jets.
So the race began. Jimmie Johnson was basically the last car in the race and Jeffy was in the top 5. Ugh, would I have to endure my sister ragging me all year because of this? I hoped not! We decided to get lunch at lap 40. I miss the raaaiiins down in AAAAAAAfrica! Yeah, because that rain that should’ve been in Africa was directly over Daytona, man. It was lap 38 so when we went to get lunch, everyone went to get lunch.
We were safely under the grandstand and dry, at least for a few minutes. We were in line, and trying to avoid getting wet, for about 25 minutes when the confrontation happened. A gentleman cut in the front of the line, just ahead of me and a couple other guys and this, this is where it got interesting. Check back tomorrow for more!
Things I Can’t Unsee from the Daytona 500 (Daytona 500 Part 3)
I interrupt the regularly scheduled post to bring you an assortment of fantastic images from the Daytona 500. Only at a NASCAR race will you see stuff like this!
Let’s Burn Rubber! (Daytona 500 Part 2)
Mean pirates.
Local fare.
Hashtags.
We all knew we should get to bed early for the long day coming, especially my dad who would do most, if not all, of driving. So the night before the race was low key. However, I scrambled to come up with some sort of allegiance to Jimmie Johnson because it turns out pretty much no retail store anywhere carries NASCAR apparel. OK, I’m obviously not an expert when it comes to fashion, because who goes to Lowe’s for clothes? Well, I do. I picked up a tool pouch and some brushed nickel address numbers. The idea was to do something a bit out of the ordinary to cheer on #48. An hour or two later, and possibly too much glue sniffing and I had it. The perfect way to support my favorite racer and carry water at the same time. #doublethreat
Once my project was complete, my dad and I settled in to watch Captain Phillips. It’s a movie about a freight ship carrying containers around the coast of Africa and the crew’s encounter with modern-day pirates. Very good movie. I won’t spoil it for you but I came away being more impressed with the military and even with a bit of compassion for the pirates, which I didn’t see coming. After that, bed time.
Rise and shine! The sun didn’t get the memo because we left in the dark headed east to Jacksonville. Just outside of Daytona we stopped for breakfast at this great little hole-in-the-wall.
And of course my sister was quick to point out the number of her favorite driver, Jeff Gordon.
After breakfast, my dad dropped my sister and me off at Lot 10 where we caught a bus to the track. Crowds and crowds of people were already there and since it was about 9:00am, we had plenty of time to wade through the crowds in search of fun things to do. She was most excited to see Jeff Gordon’s trailer, so while we were there she bought a #24 backpack. And for those of you asking, “What’s hashtag twenty-four?” Let me drop some knowledge on you. It’s number 24! #pwned
I’m a Jimmie Johnson fan if you didn’t catch that yet. And let me tell ya, I got some looks with my manly apron. But I forgot to keep paying attention to the stares because hey, we’re at the Daytona 500! So much fun. We walked around to check out all the other trailers and some of the vendors. We got a Ford backpack, a few bottles of 5-hour Energy (I love that stuff!), and a few other trinkets. Time went by faster than I thought it would so around 11:15am we made our way back to the entrance near our seats. Here’s a gallery of a few pre-race photos.
Out of the Wilderness 