Out of the Wilderness

Since I Have You: A Poem

There’s not much about you I don’t like,
you’re the coolest gal around.
Even when I lose you in the night,
as you chase a rabbit your nose found.

I know you’re needy,
but that’s not bad.
You could be greedy,
or have issues with your dad.

I know you’re not a gold-digger.
You’re more of a mole-digger.
Because the yard is full of holes with no gold.
But also no moles.

And I don’t mind that you don’t shave,
or that all four of your armpits have hair.
Or that you have hair all over your face,
and legs, and feet, and everywhere.

It could be worse,
like if I brought home your sister and you said you hate her.
Then went on to say every taboo curse,
and confessed that you’re a Gator.

I love you but I’d give you away.
It’s not illegal,
but you see, my darling beagle,
There are just certain things we don’t say.

One is anything good about the Gators,
Or the SEC, but we can get into that later.

Now I don’t know if you know this yet,
but your ears are pretty big.
All the better for hearing my pet,
I mean, would you rather be a pig?

I wonder if you could speak,
what you’d tell me when you bark.
I hope it would be,
“I love you with all my beagle heart!”

And I would say, “I love you, too, Piper!”

Snow day: Piper and I — me and Piper, 2010

There was an electricity running through the office today. It’s not like tonight is the Super Bowl or anything, but there will be a championship ring, if you will. Typically it’s a ring from Neil Lane and it’s intended for the hand of the woman to whom Juan Pablo offers the final rose. I won’t chase the rabbit trail of my prediction for tonight (Nikki wins, no proposal, they already broke up, and Andi’s the next Bachelorette) but I will say this… creators of the show need to reach out beyond the pool of former contestants for the next Bachelor and Bachelorette. I like Andi, she’s probably a nice girl. But the method they use to choose the star of every following season is very much like my dog eating her own vomit. It’s never going to be better than it was the first time around. Somehow, though, ABC continues to tell us it’s “the most dramatic season ever” or especially tonight, “the finale all of America will be talking about.”

But I’ll stop being a Negative Nancy. I’ll be Positive Paul because I’m the commissioner of the CMT Bachelor Fantasy League and tonight is our Super Bowl! One winner will be crowned and I’m excited to be keeping stats for the next 4 hours! Call me weird, just don’t call me late for dinner… and definitely don’t call me and tell me to apply to be on the show!

-Out of the Wilderness

Frog

Sometimes I feel like a frog. But I’m hoping one day I’ll look back and see a prince in all these selfies.

Thank God for Women, But I Need an Office

Today I took a short Christmas break (about 2 and a half minutes or so) when I listened to Group1Crew’s version of:

…partly to drowned out the chatter around my desk! Nothing against women, but all the people in my row are female! I can only take so much talk about current hair color, new carpet, Frozen coming out on DVD soon, and/or what food they’re not eating today. I need an office.

This song is just fun. It was severely underplayed on the radio last December but I’m hoping that changes for the upcoming Christmas season! By the way, there’s only 294 days till Santa drops down the chimney which means stores will start advertising Christmas goodies in, oh I don’t know, this weekend? You know what would make a good stocking stuffer? Frozen. This is one of the best versions of “Holly Jolly Christmas.” I particularly dig the little robotic voice that says “Merry Christmas. Me- Me- Merry Christmas.” I think it’s awesome and you know what else is awesome? Frozen‘s on DVD March 18th! I’m soooooo exxciiiitttted! *Dances away from computer singing “Let it goooo, let it goooo…”-Out of the Wilderness

Wave the Checkered Flag (Daytona 500 Part 6)

Rains came down.
Floods came up.
We went home.

Time check, it was about 4:00pm and there was no sign the rain would let up. So my sister and I decided to call in the parents for a ride back to Tallahassee. Had we known the race would definitely finish that night… who am I kidding, we still would’ve went home! The race didn’t start back up till 8:30pm so after our parents picked us up at 5, we would’ve had to wait another 3.5 hours, then another 2 or 3 hours for the race to finish! So we stayed at the track for a few hours after the rain started, but time went by fast because we met a nice family from New Jersey/Orlando (even though they were all cheering for the wrong guys- Jeff Gordon and Tony Stewart!).

We caught a ride on the bus back to Lot 10, and after walking over dirt (which was mud, actually) roads, through mushy fields, we rejoined Mom and Dad for a trip home. We bypassed Cracker Barrel (oh, and more on my lunch with the Governor at a Nashville Cracker Barrel can be found here), and b-lined it home to catch the end of the race. Hey, Jimmie Johnson still had a chance and I sure wasn’t going to be that fan who missed his first place finish!

Turns out he didn’t finish in first but hey, neither did ol’ Jeffy Gordon so at least my sister wasn’t going to rub it in. Dale Earnhardt, Jr. won which seems sort of fitting after his dad’s #3 car was back on the track for the first time since Dale, Sr. drove it.

All in all, a great trip down to Florida for a fun time with my sister! Maybe we’ll do it again next year, but without the rain and the war of words with Gator Belly! I’m so glad she and I could go to the race. It’ll be a memory we love having for the rest of our lives. Sure it was a lot of driving for a whirlwind trip to Florida and back to Tennessee, but isn’t that sorta what life is about? Taking those moments to do something adventurous. To spend time with family, to laugh, to keep saying there’s no way Jeff Gordon will beat Jimmie Johnson, not because I really believe that, but because it makes my sister laugh. That’s what it was about for me. If she had a good time, then I don’t care about anything else.

Thanks for reading. Here’s a gallery of more pictures from Daytona and my drive back to Nashville. You are awesome for reading all these posts!