Chomp, Chomp! The Gators of Myakka River State Park

To say Myakka River has a few alligators would be like saying Washington has a few dirty politicians. Hi there, I’m Ben, and I rather swim naked with steaks tied to my arms and legs in a lake full of gators who haven’t eaten in 7 days than rub elbows with a Washington politician. *snaps out of it* Oh gosh, sorry about that mini rant on corrupt government, I hardly knew this post would start off THAT way. But heyyyyy, thanks for stopping by! I’ve been camping around Florida, mostly at state parks. My latest camping adventure brought me to Myakka River State Park, nestled between 73 big alligators and 195 REALLY big alligators.

I’m going to type up a recap of my entire experience, which was a mostly fun one (except for the day I totally overextended myself and got dehydrated, too). But today is all about the big, scary, ancient, frightening, fascinating, dinosaur alligator creature. Back when I was just an innocent lad (a couple months ago), I thought something was amiss… as I had not seen an alligator after taking my talents to ~~south~~ Florida. Well, that’s all done changed now. I can’t even keep track of how many I’ve seen! And part of that is thanks to Myakka River State Park. I mean, just look at this monster as observed from the safety of a bridge even though I will neither confirm nor deny that I tinkled in my underwear a little bit when I saw it.

As if to send a message to the human observers, this one is swimming off with a deceased turtle.

Come to think of it, the gator wasn’t just sending us humans a message. To this other (relatively) smaller gator, he also made very clear this was his turtle. The turtle was his. Belonging to him… was this turtle. Just look how he makes the gator jump when it got too close to the turtle (which was his, apparently).

They can jump, too?????? Here I was thinking the bridge was going to keep me safe! Three things were solidified in this moment on the bridge, after seeing this… 1. As if it wasn’t already clear, I WOULD NOT BE KAYAKING IN OR AROUND THIS RIVER. 2. I need more underwear. 3. *thinks for a second* Yes, I would still jump in this river naked and swim towards the biggest gator I could find than socialize with a Washington politician.

Here are a few other pics of gators in the area.