10 Days of Top 10 Posts: #9

The 9th ranked post on Out of the Wilderness has so much information, you may think it came straight from a 1993 Encyclopedia Britannica! You know the ones your parents had on the shelf beside the TV? You probably used them for history assignments in junior high. Or to prop up a crooked table. Well, I give you permission to use this post if you’re ever in need of some useless reality TV information. More specifically, The Bachelor! That’s right, I said it. The Bachelor. Arguably the most successful reality TV show since WWF wrestling.

#9: Las Vegas, Jimmie Johnson, The Bachelor, Carrot Top, And More!

More about the post: This post is a recap of “The Bachelor Brad Womack: The Women Tell All,” but the real reason it’s ranked #9 is for the pictures. I had no idea so many people were interested in Carrot Top’s pictures pre- and post-steroids. But alas, many search terms that bring people to Out of the Wilderness include “Carrot Top.” Other pictures include Jimmie Johnson’s #48 car as he drove by, Chuck Norris, and Kip from Napoleon Dynamite… those 3 combine for the triple threat of manliness, am I right?

carrot top

10 Days of Top 10 Posts: #10

Is it summer yet?
Is it summer yet?

Hard to believe it’s already December and while there’s clearly still time left in 2013, I present the “Out of the Wilderness Top 10 Posts of the Year”! If doing this before December 31st rubs you the wrong way, then I encourage you to bookmark the page and revisit it on new year’s day. Hey, that’ll give you something fun to do at halftime of any of the 75 football games going on that day. Out of the Wilderness had 122 new posts this year, which is roughly 1 every 3 days. The list below, though… it encompasses the entire Wilderness catalog. So before I get all misty-eyed, let’s get to it!

#10: Ten Signs You’re More Redneck Than You Think

More about the post: I’ll let you in on a little secret… I love lists. So around the time of this particular post, I was making lists of other Top 10’s also. I don’t know what got into me! So anyway, this post includes a few things I’ve noticed over the years about people who are typically considered rednecks. And this was before I ever started watching Duck Dynasty! I’m sure there would be a few more additions had I typed it up after getting hooked on DD.

Check back tomorrow for #9…

-Out of the Wilderness

I Could Be A Turkey, So I Guess I Can’t Complain

During Thanksgiving weekend, take time to ponder all the things you’re grateful for. Enjoy leftovers. Watch football. And hey, have some compassion for the relatives in your family who aren’t married!

It’s true that being single is worst around the holidays, and more specifically when you’re with family. But it doesn’t have anything to do with being lonely. This weekend I’m with my sisters, brother-in-law, 4 nieces and my parents, plus 4 dogs. So there’s definitely no down time. In fact, I’m surprised there was even time for this post! Actually, I’m not. Sleeping on the couch, I’m never the first one awake, but I’m always the second. This morning I swear my dad was in the kitchen nearby crinkling paper for no reason at all. I And I guess he thought it was a good time to bang pots and pans together like it’s new year’s eve. So I stayed on the couch hoping to God I could fall back asleep.

I suppose marriage would earn me a spot in one of the coveted bedrooms. You should see ’em: mattresses, real sheets, no crinkling paper at 7:00am. In fact, it may be worth exchanging vows just to sleep in on holiday mornings.

Gobble, Gobble!
-Out of the Wilderness

Frozen: Movie Review

Disney recently released a movie called Frozen and I guess I should start by saying I haven’t actually seen the movie per se. And by “per se,” I mean I haven’t seen it at all. But I have 4 nieces under the age of 12 and they watched the film a few days ago. So here’s a quick synopsis.

Snowman: funniest character in the movie.

Memorable line: the snowman loves the summer. He sings a rhyming song about how, in the winter he likes to cuddle, and in the summer he’ll be a… happy snowman.

Final Thought: The movie is a must-see because my nieces want to see it again… and so does my brother-in-law.

Aren’t you happy this whole post wasn’t a spoiler? You’re welcome.

frozen movie

Snow White and the Red Lines

Nashville boasts it’s first snow of winter today! Yes, it’s something special. A sight to behold. Unfortunately, if you’re in the car, you’ll have plenty of time to behold.

Son: Look, mommy, it’s a Christmas map!
Mommy: No son, that’s traffic. And even if Santa was real, he’d be stuck on I-24 till January!
Son: Wait, what?

This is what happens in Nashville when it snows. Flurries is all it takes!
This is what happens in Nashville when it snows. Flurries is all it takes!