Please Tell Me This Is Normal. #8

I feel like a Southerner. Why? How many Northerners have to mow their driveway? I think all they do is drink unsweet tea and talk about the big snow of ’04. I’m right, right? Let me know. Meanwhile, I’ll be outside mowing the yard/driveway.

Please Tell Me This Is Normal. #7

I went for a jog today around lunch time. After I ran past this one lady, I thought, “She smells like an estate sale.” Not sure if I’m asking if I’m normal, or she is, but either way, I love estate sales. Especially the ones with old records, low prices, and extremely odd items, for instance, see picture below.

Please Tell Me This Is Normal. #6

(For more questions I have about what’s normal, click here, here, or here. Thanks!)

I recently noticed a habit when I unlock my car with the keychain remote. I hit the button, then in my head I say, “Kunta Kinte.” The reference is from the TV miniseries, “Roots,” starring LeVar Burton as Kunta Kinte. I guess I do it because the mechanical operation of the door unlocking sounds like ‘Kunta,’ so I follow it up with ‘Kinte.’ What? Would you rather me say “Toby Waller” instead!? Come on, have some respect!

Kunta Kinte in “Roots”

Please Tell Me This Is Normal. #5

Trying to be a good daddy to two whipper-snappers named Piper and Asia, I generously decided they could forgo their crates today and play in the backyard all morning while I was at work. I know, I know… my grand gesture was nothing short of heroic. What a guy, right?

I got to work and noticed it was getting cloudy. Radar check. Holy crap.

Ok sure, I left them out in the rain for an hour or so, but I was also the only one rushing home to save them. Let’s not downplay it, I’m a hero. What a guy!

For more stuff that may or may not be normal, click here.

Please Tell Me This Is Normal. #4

Whenever I watch movies like Titanic, Open Water, Castaway, or Rescue Dawn, I always wonder why in the world they don’t ask the camera guy for help!? I mean, he’s right there.

That’s what I would do if I were floating in the ocean, stuck on an island, or taken captive in Vietnam and someone was following me with a camera.

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