Sports, and Why Guys Like Them

Football. Baseball. Hockey. Basketball. Tennis. Soccer. Nascar. What do these sports have in common? There must be a winner. Of all the rules in all of sports (and let’s face it, in some sports there are way too many rules (yes I’m talking to you NFL)), requiring a winner is the single most attractive thing about sports. If you then connect this all-important rule to the male mind, it’s very easy to see why guys like sports. Because in a guy’s mind, there is order. There is a #1. There is a #2. There is a #3 and so on.Open up the passion for sports in a more broad fashion, and you’ll discover it’s more about competing than it is about the actual sport, though. My favorites to play are football and basketball. My favorite to watch is football. But my ultra favorite thing to do? Win. It can be pick-up basketball at the Y, it can be a 5K race or a race up the stairs. It can also be something as absurd as the Nashville Fantasy Bachelor League. Guys want to be #1. And when we can’t be, we cheer for a team we think can.

Lance Armstrong, Tour De France winner

A friend of mine is a self-proclaimed sports agnostic. He’s not against athletics, he’s not against athletes. But he is against those fanatics. If you’re interested, his thoughts on the subject are posted here. What I submit to him is the idea that sports should be viewed on a broader scale (like I mentioned, it’s more about competing).If my friend were to watch a football game the way he writes blogs, I think he may begin to understand. Yes, my friend is a writer. And before you say, “Well, no wonder the flower child doesn’t like sports! He’s one of those weirdo creative types,” you should know that he is an Alabama Crimson Tide fan as well (Now you have my permission to say it). His allegiance to Alabama is more for the sake of picking a side (Alabama or Auburn) than it is about actually liking the team, but hey, at least he’s aware that there are sides in that fight.When my friend writes, he spends time and energy making the delivery and presentation a top notch product. Why? It’s not so the reader will like it. It’s so the reader will like it more than anything else they read. When the Seattle Seahawks take the field against the New Orleans Saints they want to run the right plays and score points, but not just to play well. They want to win the game and be the best in the league. My friend writing to be the best and the Seahawks playing to be the best are the same thing.

Why guys likes sports can be summed up in four points.
Challenge. It’s exciting to push skills to the limit, and watch other people do the same.
Competition. An exciting way to measure talents, passions and skills.
Hitting. Guys like to hit things, or watch people hit things.
Hierarchy. There must be a #1. This idea is built into the male DNA. If you’re a guy, you are born with the desire to be king of the mountain, and have songs written about your halls. 

The Best of 2010

Last year welcomed a new blog into the world. Since the birth of ‘Out of the Wilderness’ in April, the site has attracted 26,604 views. The postings on this site cover everything from dolphins to Nashville to mustaches, Boney M, music, the power of words, ghosts, personality types, the BP oil spill, online dating, and much more. With all the variety of topics, though, the highest viewed posts are about the 2010 season of “The Bachelorette.” I posted a weekly review after each episode from the very first episode (meet the Bachelors) to the last when Ali picked Roberto Martinez over Chris Lambton. Curiosity about Chris drew in the most clicks among Bachelorette posts. However, the post with the most views overall will surprise you. It’s about a band called Boney M, international stars from the 1970s. Sadly, the male lead from the band died recently so searches for Bobby Farrell and Boney M have surged quite a bit since then. Without further explanation, here are stats from ‘Out of the Wilderness’ this year, in order of most viewed:

1. Boney M In A Green Taxi
views: 9,699

2. The Bachelorette, Chris L.’s Tattoo Pictures
views: 6,887

3. The Bachelorette Episode 10
views: 839

4. The Bachelorette, Chris L.’s Birthday
views: 448

5. The Bachelorette Episode 4
views: 412

6. Slept Like A Log
views: 376

7. About the Author
views: 252

8. The Bachelorette Episode 8
views: 163

9. Will You Accept This Prose?
views: 147

10. Where Are All the Men
views: 138

11. The Bachelorette Episode 3
views: 138

12. Music Roulette: 50 Songs In 1 Paragraph
views: 134

13. Popular YouTube videos
views: 120

14. Fantasy Football 2010 Draft Order
views: 112

15. Ben Wilder vs. Nick Shell: A Facebook Battle
views: 110

205 Days and Counting

No, the title of this post has nothing to do with car racing or lines that are funny if you add “in bed” at the end. Driftwood Detectatory, II has reached a milestone- over 20,000 post views! A huge thanks to you, the reader, for clicking on my posts, commenting on them, and passing them along to your friends (see Where Are All The Men). Also a big thanks for passing them along to your enemies (see You Aren’t Awesome).

The site would not be where it is today without these top five posts:

Chris Lambton’s Tattoo Pictures
(from Ali’s season on the Bachelorette)

Boney M In A Green Taxi

Home Page
(takes you to my most recent post)

Episode 10 of The Bachelorette
(from Ali’s season on the Bachelorette)

Chris Lambton’s Birthday
(from Ali’s season on the Bachelorette)

Here are a select group of my favorite posts:

Sharing A House With Dog

Satellites and Captains

The Three-Star Spangled Banner

And here are some funny search terms from the 205 days this site has been active:
1984 barbie
dolphin tramp stamp
barbie vs. firecracker
a girl keeps checking my online profile
awesome dog
I don’t eat dogs
Chuck Norris xs
weird guy droid

Thanks, everybody!
Ben

Pet Peeves

A few of my current pet peeves.

1. Long receipts. So much information that I’ll never read. Check out your neighborhood Wal-Mart and you may notice the same thing I noticed. I recently went there to buy dog food when PetSmart was closed. I bought one thing, dog food. My receipt was 11.75 inches long! (yes I measured)

2. The recurring “must restart computer message”… every 5 minutes. Is it so important to restart my computer and install updates that I should drop everything I’m doing or be reminded to do so 96 times in a day (5 times per hour for 8 hours)? I don’t want to restart my computer right now. Ask me again at 6pm. This is almost as annoying as getting emails that tell me my mailbox is almost full.
3. Emails that tell me my mailbox is almost full. Well, if they’d stop sending me emails about it, my mailbox wouldn’t be so full!
4. Christian Copycat. This next one has been on my list for a long time. Nothing is more uncreative, nothing is more cheesy than copycat marketing. Christian apparel does this religously. Hehe, get it?
5. “In Memory Of” car stickers. I’m not trying to offend anyone with this pet peeve of mine. I’m in total support of honoring those that have died, certainly people that were close, whether family or friends. But what exactly is in memory of the person? The way you drive? Your car? Your rear window?
6. CBS Channel 5 in Nashville. I have Comcast cable and CBS comes in snowy. Maybe the pet peeve is that I have Comcast cable.
7. Fist bumps. Ok, I’ll admit it was cool back in the early 2000s, but here’s the rule to go by: when ESPN anchors do it, it’s no longer cool.

Popular YouTube Videos

I’ve been posting videos online for 4 years. To date, there are 153 videos under the Driftwood145 label. I’ve listed the 12 most-viewed videos below and descriptions of each. Which is your favorite?

Boney M: Hooray! Hooray!
views: 3,425,401
I discovered Boney M in 2006 when I was in Vietnam along with my sister and brother-in-law who were adopting a baby girl. We were in a taxi, the driver had a disc playing. The two songs I remember hearing were “Rasputin” (which is another great hit from Boney M) and “Hooray! Hooray!” Boney M has been popular internationally since the 1970s and were produced by the same guy who later produced Milli Vanilli. This video gets views from all over the world, especially outside the United States. Here’s the monster international hit, “Hooray! Hooray!”

Boney M: Mary’s Boy Child
views: 543,994
Probably my favorite Christmas song of all time. This also could be Boney M’s most well-known hit simply because it’s played on radio stations around the world during the Christmas season. The song, the video, both are great. I love this band from the 1970s. Here’s Boney M’s Christmas classic, “Mary’s Boy Child.”

Football Hit / Green Bay vs. Jacksonville
views: 194,403
This video was recorded in the 2007 NFL pre-season when the Green Bay Packers played against the Jacksonville Jaguars. Desmond Bishop (#55) laid a hit on Reggie Williams (#11) that popped his helmet off. Some say it was because of his dreads, others just admit it was a good hit. But also a good job holding onto the ball. This video proves pretty well that people like watching football hits.

Lost Error
views: 133,270
If you don’t watch Lost, this video will be lost on you. Here, Charlie is in the Looking Glass Station, held as a prisoner not long before he died. Charlie gets punched in the face. No blood on the face. Then he has blood on his face, then later, the blood is gone again. Small mistake, but a mistake nonetheless. Here is the Lost error…

Bike Wreck
views: 93,314
The title pretty much explains itself. Except the bicycle rider does a matrix style exit off the bike, thus avoiding a collision with the mailbox. The video has been picked up by America’s Funniest Home Videos and has aired on that show a few times. Check it out!

Taylor Swift Star-Spangled Banner
views: 72,781
Taylor performed the National Anthem on a Thanksgiving NFL game featuring the Miami Dolphins and the Detroit Lions. It was November 23, 2006, quite early in Taylor’s career. Surprisingly, this is probably the most controversial video on my YouTube page. Comments range from calling the performance amazing to blasting Taylor as a terrible singer and ruining the song. What is your take?

Zac Brown Band perform “Free” on Late Night with David Letterman
views: 77,050
“Free” was released on April 12, 2010 on the album “The Foundation.”

Surprise Marriage Proposal
views: 59,310
I was working at Kanakuk Kamps in Lampe, Missouri in 2000. One of the staff members was about to take a day off to spend it with his girlfriend. She came to the front office to meet him there. From there, they were going to walk to the car. Once they left the office, the guy faked an ankle injury. His girlfriend went to the office to get the first aid kit. Little did she know the ring he would offer her was in the first aid kit! So she brings it out to him. He talks about how much he loves her, etc etc etc. Then he switches knees, pulls out the ring, and shocks her by asking her to marry him. Once she says yes, you can hear the campers cheering in the background (some with bottle rockets). Very creative way to propose!

Play Beyonce Clown off, Keyboard Cat
views: 39,680
Not much can be said about this one. Two videos were already on YouTube. I combined them. Here it is:

The glory days at Florida State
views: 17,121
This team featured Chris Weinke, Anquan Boldin, and a few other star athletes. The NC State Wolfpack featured the quarterback, Phillip Rivers. He was a cheap player back then, as you can see in the video. Can you tell I’m not a fan of Phillip Rivers?

Marching Chiefs… Florida State Band
views: 14,781
This performance was from the night before the 2007 Music City Bowl in Nashville, TN. There is no band like the Marching Chiefs. Here’s their performance of “Seminole Uprising.”

Vietnam Karaoke
views: 11,221
I went to Vietnam in 2006 with my sister and her husband. They were adopting a little girl and I tagged along to videotape the process. More videos can be seen on my YouTube page about the whole adoption process, meanwhile, though, check out the experience I had singing karaoke one night in Vietnam. They do it different there, it’s not in front of a bunch of people you don’t know. We got our own private room with a television and a couple of couches. So then we sang songs in front of each other in the little room. And yes, the last song on this video is “Beat It” by Michael Jackson. Enjoy!